I fancy a walk with a particular woman,
How her face comes gracefully over her shoulder.
It is the second time that she’s not said a word and
I continue to wait for her apology.
But, she still doesn’t get it.
She was in a relationship
When she wrote me
And I told her to do so when she was single.
Of course, I wrote back almost instantly
That it probably didn’t matter
But of course it did.
Relationships are about power
And that’s why she came to me.
She’d heard that I had broken it off with a woman
She’d known around work,
Who was completely destroyed by it.
She’d often talk about how a married man was a prize.
Not because he was someone she liked,
But that it represented a challenge.
I figured it was because she was taking him away from another woman.
I thought to myself,
My sins were committed out of actual desire,
For her, relationships were a game;
She drove me crazy.
She never apologized and then blamed me,
Like I was stalking her.
Except that I was visiting my mother the first time.
My mother lived just down the street from the gas station,
Where the two of us stood.
She rushed to finish her fill-up.
I must have smiled,
But inside I loved her
Inside, I was sad.
It was one-way.
She couldn’t see me
She couldn’t see anyone but herself.
Despite that I fancied a walk with her,
She would no longer have it,
Like I was some twisted creep,
Who was dangerous in my silence?
I was hoping she’d apologize to me,
But she didn’t.